{"id":5695,"date":"2019-01-29T12:56:01","date_gmt":"2019-01-29T10:56:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/besigebreintjies.co.za\/?p=5695"},"modified":"2020-11-23T12:05:50","modified_gmt":"2020-11-23T10:05:50","slug":"5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/besigebreintjies.co.za\/af\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Powerful Parenting Phrases That Make Talking to Kids Easier"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

“At the same time”<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Using\nthe word “but” can complicate already tense conversations. Often seen\nas negating whatever came before, it can create confusion and hurt feelings.\nThe phrase, “I love you, but\u2026” or “I’m sorry, but\u2026” comes\noff as “I love you, but not enough,” or “I’m sorry, but not\nreally.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Instead,\nuse the phrase, “at the same time”. This phrase validates both what\ncomes before and after as coexisting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“I\nlove you. At the same time, I can’t let you hurt other people. \u201cI\u2019m sorry\nyou’re upset. At the same time, running away isn’t safe.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat do you think you could do”<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

As\nexperienced problem-solvers ourselves, it can be tempting to swoop right in and\nfix every problem. But it’s important that we give kids ownership of and\npractice with the problem-solving process.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“What\ndo you think you could do to help your sister feel better?” “What do\nyou think you could do to make things right with your friend?” “What\ndo you think you could do to make sure everyone gets a turn?” “What\ndo you think you could do to take care of this spill?”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Notice\nthat children are not only invited to come up with a proposed solution, but to\nown it. “What do YOU think YOU could do\u2026”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat I know is\u201d<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

There\nare times when our kids tell us things we KNOW are not true. But when we jump\nto, “That’s a lie!\u201d they typically shut down or become defensive.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whether\nit’s lying, magical thinking, or a complete misunderstanding, we can avoid an\nargument or an overreaction by calmly starting with what we know.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“What\nI know is that there were four cookies on the plate when I left.”\n“What I know is that toys can’t move by themselves.” “What I\nknow is that Jesse’s mom wasn’t home today.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI’m sorry”<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Kids\naren’t always the ones making the mistakes in these difficult situations.\nSometimes our imperfections are the best starting point for important learning\nopportunities.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When we\napologise for our shortcomings, we model how to make appropriate apologies, but\nalso teach our children that we all make mistakes. When they see us acknowledge\nand apologize, they learn that they can do the same. Additionally, when we\nrepair our relationships, we make them stronger.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThank you\u201d<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Along\nwith all the hard situations, we have to acknowledge the great ones (or even a\ngreat sliver of a really hard day). Just like we want to know our hard work is\nappreciated every day, our children want to know that their effort is noticed\nas well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“Thank you for packing your lunch this morning.” “Thank you for being such a respectful listener.” “Thank you for helping your sister.” Even, “Thank you for doing your jobs. I know you wanted to do other things first. (Unspoken: Because you threw a big fit beforehand.) I really appreciate you doing it even though it was hard.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Source: <\/strong>Motherly<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“At the same time” Using the word “but” can complicate already tense conversations. Often seen as negating whatever came before, it can create confusion and hurt feelings. The phrase, “I love you, but\u2026” or “I’m sorry, but\u2026” comes off as “I love you, but not enough,” or “I’m sorry, but not really.” Instead, use the phrase, “at the same time”. This phrase validates both what comes before and after as coexisting. “I love you. At the same time, I can’t let you hurt other people. \u201cI\u2019m sorry you’re upset. At the same time, running away isn’t safe.” \u201cWhat do you think you could do” As experienced problem-solvers ourselves, it can be tempting to swoop right in and fix every problem. But it’s important that we give kids ownership of and practice with the problem-solving process. “What do you think you could do to help your sister feel better?” “What do you think you could do to make things right with your friend?” “What do you think you could do to make sure everyone gets a turn?” “What do you think you could do to take care of this spill?” Notice that children are not only invited to come up with […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5695","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-interesting-articles"],"yoast_head":"\n5 Powerful Parenting Phrases That Make Talking to Kids Easier - Besige Breintjies<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/besigebreintjies.co.za\/af\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"5 Powerful Parenting Phrases That Make Talking to Kids Easier - Besige Breintjies\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"“At the same time” Using the word “but” can complicate already tense conversations. Often seen as negating whatever came before, it can create confusion and hurt feelings. The phrase, “I love you, but\u2026” or “I’m sorry, but\u2026” comes off as “I love you, but not enough,” or “I’m sorry, but not really.” Instead, use the phrase, “at the same time”. This phrase validates both what comes before and after as coexisting. “I love you. At the same time, I can’t let you hurt other people. \u201cI\u2019m sorry you’re upset. At the same time, running away isn’t safe.” \u201cWhat do you think you could do” As experienced problem-solvers ourselves, it can be tempting to swoop right in and fix every problem. But it’s important that we give kids ownership of and practice with the problem-solving process. “What do you think you could do to help your sister feel better?” “What do you think you could do to make things right with your friend?” “What do you think you could do to make sure everyone gets a turn?” “What do you think you could do to take care of this spill?” Notice that children are not only invited to come up with […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/besigebreintjies.co.za\/af\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Besige Breintjies\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-01-29T10:56:01+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2020-11-23T10:05:50+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/besigebreintjies.co.za\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/talking.png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Besige Breintjies\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Besige Breintjies\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/besigebreintjies.co.za\\\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/besigebreintjies.co.za\\\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Besige Breintjies\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/besigebreintjies.co.za\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/ce9ead25e489312e7ceffdb84f3b801b\"},\"headline\":\"5 Powerful Parenting Phrases That Make Talking to Kids Easier\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-01-29T10:56:01+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2020-11-23T10:05:50+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/besigebreintjies.co.za\\\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":512,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/besigebreintjies.co.za\\\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/besigebreintjies.co.za\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/01\\\/talking.png\",\"articleSection\":[\"Interesting Articles\"],\"inLanguage\":\"af-ZA\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/besigebreintjies.co.za\\\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/besigebreintjies.co.za\\\/5-powerful-parenting-phrases-that-make-talking-to-kids-easier\\\/\",\"name\":\"5 Powerful Parenting Phrases That Make Talking to Kids Easier - 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